Saturday, 11 February 2012

The Cougar and The Blazer Squad...

So... Still a duck but moving on to carry on telling you about what happened next!

Ali had text me the morning after the night before, and I realised that I am totally over the "he is the size of a giant" and I start thinking yeah this could be ok.  From texts I find out that he is 2 and a half years younger than me.. but due to his height, and my obvious youthful looks (pahahahaha, genuine lol as I typed that!) I didn't look like too much of a cougar...
I started a job in St James Park, on the Monday after Halloween, and funnily enough, it transpired that I caught the same train home as Ali (when he ran from work to the tube and sprinted across Liverpool Street station to reach the once an hour train to Treetown).  Ali and I texted each other all day everyday, and he managed to make me smile at every text.  I got butterflys and excited when he text.  On our journeys home together, and when we walked back to our cars which were respectively parked next to each other there was never a good time to kiss though!  On one occassion, and I forget now why, but I didn't have my car and he offered me a life home and when we got back I looked at him and said "so are you actually going to kiss me then?!"  He obliged and seem quite grateful that I had brought it up!  I had completely forgotten that I was meeting Kelly, Mr Wells and Red that night though, so when I met up and they asked how things had been I went bright red and continued to tell them that we had been texting and kissing!  It felt like being back at school!

After a very successful date on Oxford Street (he took me to look at the Christmas lights and we had a drink) we were getting on really well, but there was still an unnatural awkwardness where we didn't just kiss, but we wanted to.  I was the one who took the plunge again, standing at the station waiting for the train, I looked up and thought "if I wait for you, this is never going to happen!"  I also realised that if he pulled away/didn't kiss me back, I would look an absolute banana, with over a foot height difference, I would be coming back down to earth with a bump!  No "oh crap" though because he kissed me back!

A few nights later, we were both going to the same party, and whilst we were nowhere near being a couple it would be the first time that we were together in front of our friends (the Halloween party aside).  When I turned up with my friends Ali wasn't there and he didn't arrive until around half ten.  The party was in aid of two of our friends emigrating to Australia.  Tanisha and Colin definitely knew how to leave the country in style! 

It seemed that everyone at the party had received an invisible memo to wear a blazer!  It was quite entertaining when the photos all appeared on facebook, we looked liked we had all called each other to confirm that blazers were in fact a must!  This was guys and girls!  Anyway back to Ali... he breezed in the room and the usual awkwardness was there for a while.  Until everyone ended up having group photos at one end of the hall and we ended up kissing at the other!  Until someone very loudly said "look at those two, when did that happen".. Busted!  A whole room of people staring... oh crap, there's the embarrassed Missi again!

I didn't follow into town that night, I kissed Ali goodbye (a lot!... Well the secret was out now!) and took a cab home with Sarah-Jayne.  On the way back, she got out her phone and showed me an album of photos she has taken of me and Ali kissing, describing us as cute.. Oh god!  We had turned into cute?....

Not so much, shy Ali disappeared when he sent an absolutely filthy text at about 3am!  Where did that come from?!  It was to the point where I did not reply to it because it was off the dirty scale!  And it was something that wasn't mentioned.. ever again!

Things were going well with Ali, until one night he was acting out of the ordinary and I asked him outright.  He said that he didn't want to be a prick.  That means that he was about to be in my book.  He said that he really liked me but realised that he still had feelings for his ex-girlfriend... Well I bowed out of that one quicker than you can ensemble a bunch of people wearing blazers!  I wasn't coming second for anyone... So as quickly and randomly had that whirlwind started it was over...

Until We Meet Again... xx


  1. Your life seems to have come together. I am so pleased for you. You have displayed real courage and you should feel proud of yourself. What "He" did to you is beyond horrendous, and I have seen that throughout the blog you haven't said much about the guy. Though I guess you don't need to as a basic overview gives us a lot of information. I don't think I would have been as brave as you and it seems like you kept a lot of dignity. excellent idea to start a blog about it, this kind of thing doesnt happen every day especially to a woman so young. Keep strong Missi xo

  2. Cassandra...

    Thank you for your lovely words. I won't lie, it has been somewhat of an uphill struggle, but I am finally getting somewhere! It is the hardest thing I have ever had to cope with, but I totally believe now that I can achieve almost anything with willpower and good friends. I am pleased that you can see through writing and telling my story that I have kept my dignity. believe me, it wasn't always easy!! lol! Thank you again for your comments..

    Missi... xx


Please leave your feedback below or you can email me at