Wednesday, 4 January 2012

Dabbling In The Unknown...

So I have a lot of time on my hands since being made redundant again, and as I started this blog I found I spent a lot of time at my desk in front of the laptop and online...
I had read a book whilst in Greece about internet dating and decided that what did I have to lose?  Now I know that internet dating is becoming more popular, but I still felt it had a stigma attached to it.  I spoke to Miss Cupcake and she was adamant that it would be a good idea, and as I was babysitting her daughter and 2 nephews I started writing my profile one evening.  I had her proof read what I had written before I uploaded it and I was away.
I chose the site I was on in an attempt to meet someone on my wavelength.  The guys I was meeting prior to this weren't exactly relationship material, and whilst I wasn't necessarily looking for a relationship, a coherent conversation would have been nice!  I figured that if I didn't fall in love then I might make some friends... My theory proved correct.
Within 10 minutes of signing up I had around 20 "likes" and "inboxes"... not bad, but as it was midnight, I was concerned at the pace :-/
I sent my first response the next day, and decided that I would actually read the inboxes I had recieved.  I replied to some of them.  I signed up for a month only.  The reason I only signed up for a month was because I was seeing this more as a social experiement than actually finding the man of my dreams.  That was just a bonus if I found him!  I knew I needed to keep in the dating loop and this seemed a good method.

After a couple of weeks (and without sounding big headed!) I realised that I couldn't possibly reply to everyone out of politeness as I had originally started to do and had to play the selective game... though some of the messages were just too funny not to give my best one-liners back, harsh?!
The first was a guy called Sam, who in his photo was an absolute god!  We swapped email addresses and he seemed really nice, I asked for a photo as the online photo he had used in his profile was a modelling shot and was too good to be true (I'm not an idiot!) he replied with another modelling shot... time to move on this guy was having a laugh!  He persisted to email and I am one of those people that is too polite to say F*$% off and he asked me what shoe size I was... you can see how this went right?....
Next was a guy who said, come to Zimbabwe with me?  eeerrrrr... NO!  The guy who said "I just want you to use me"....  So internet dating really is just full of weirdos!  The guy who said "you fit all the specifications of a trophy girlfriend!"... yep people think its acceptable to say pretty much anything!  Needless to say that I did not date any of these people!
I decided after these people who had found me, that maybe I should look at others... I typed ages 21-49, though Miss Cupcake told me this was too old... I started talking to Gaz, 47, single father of one.  Only a couple of people knew that I was on the site (for safety reasons - there's little miss sensible again!) so only limited people could have an opinion on the 22 year age gap!  I got on well with him and arranged a date, but it never went ahead when he asked if I would be ready to settle down, get married and have children.  A bit too soon maybe?!

This wasn't going to plan... but I ploughed on determined to finish the month... by week 3, I was addicted to the site.. constantly checking it for updates and when speaking to someone I liked, there was always that girl in me that checked to see if he had messaged.  I realised that I spent more time on the site than doing any of the things that I should have been doing and it was quite unhealthy...
I met two guys at the same time, both of whom I spoke to a lot.  First, Sam #2, could not be further from my type if he tried, but we got on really well by text and over the phone and when he asked me out I decided that he was going to be my first date from the site.  Deciding not to meet in London (where he lived) we met about 30 miles from where I live, in a town where I knew people (there's little Miss Sensible again! She comes out a lot!)... so I pull up and park and no sign of him.  I call and he tells me is just around the corner and then he pulls up in a very pretty car.  I know squat about cars.  But I know about pretty things!  He gets out of the car, and... looks NOTHING like his picture!  Still not my type though.  we proceeded to have a lovely evening, having dinner and drinks and left the evening with a kiss on the cheek and a "we shall definitely speak soon".

I had been dreading the date, but was quite pleased with my progress and how the I managed to leave the social reject in me at home and be the nice girl that I am when I get to know someone!  We spoke on the phone when I got in and arranged to meet in London for the next date.  The next day we were texting in the morning about general stuff and we spoke on the phone around lunch time deciding where we were going to go for dinner on our next date and when it would be... maybe this internet thing was working... NOPE.. never heard from him again!  Seriously weird!  This infuriated both my mother and Miss Cupcake in sheer curiosity on what the hell happened.  We realised that we may be jumping the gun and something terrible could have happened, but it definitely didn't because I saw him online! Jackass!  I left a rude text on his phone asking where he left his manners and that was that so they say!

Onto date number two with Tobias... We met at a nearby shopping centre during the day for lunch and shopping, good date choice!  I realise that he looks nothing like his photo.. again!  I also realise that everyone uploads their best photos because who would upload a crap one?!  The date goes well and I find him very funny!  We arrange a second meeting and he invites me to his home town by the sea... quite romantic in theory.  In practice it was September and bloody cold!  We kissed, but nothing else.. I liked him a lot, even though I could look at him and say "he is not that attractive at all".. there was something about him that I liked.  He arranged to come to my home town and meet my friends on my birthday... he couldn't make it because of work committments.  To be fair, I knew about his job from the beginning, but still.  We never met up again, but we still regularly speak on the phone as friends.  If only he lived closer and could make a bit more time!  This is the good instance of my time on that site, I met someone I would genuinely call my friend... And Dale said it would be a complete disaster!... No more internet dating, back to convention....

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